their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
