The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Randomize
