i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
