have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
