So drunk, too bad you don't want this
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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