Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
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