There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
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