alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
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