I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize