I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
