I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Boobs are out for the taking
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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