im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
