not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize