My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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