its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize