I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
