I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
