1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
