My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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