weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize