First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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