There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
