Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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