The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize