Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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