i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize