Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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