Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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