I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
