okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
