I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
