I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
