check it out our google latitudes are spooning
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
