I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
