Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
