he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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