I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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