we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize