Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
