But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
