o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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