Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
