Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
My life is pants optional.
Randomize