Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
