Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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