We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Randomize
