In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
