More tranny stories later!
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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