Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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