She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
